The F word

Well, the truth has finally become unavoidable.


Since I left Christianity and stopped believing in god, I have been allowing myself to think that perhaps, despite the anti-women preaching I’ve been subjected to over the years, despite the strong bond between Evangelical Christianity and the Republican Party, despite my old pastors and my father and Billy Graham and James Dobson and all the other men who felt it their duty to brainwash me… despite all that, and despite my husband’s differing opinion, I have allowed myself to confess the truth.


I am a feminist.


I believe a woman’s right to control her fertility is a fundamental right.  It is her womb and her child and her blessing and her burden, and anyone else’s involvement is by invitation only.


I believe that men and women are equal, and without any of the “equal with different roles” or “men are leaders and women are supporters” bullshit that I ate for 27 years.  There are two people in my household; therefore there are two, not one, heads of the household.


And while I’m at it, the rejection of the feminine aspect from the sacred realm– the denial of a feminine place in the godhead or in religious ceremonies– is wrong.  I don’t know why it took me so long to figure this out, but I’m sure it had to do with women’s complicity.


I believe that women should enjoy sex and showing off their bodies, and not just in the ways the Christian men say we can (in marriage only; for husband only). 


To say that “a woman can do anything a man can do” is misguided.  Equality is not defined from a man’s perspective; it is defined from a human one.  A woman must be guaranteed the freedom do whatever she chooses and is able to do.


A woman’s name is her own, as well as her property, her children, her vote, her health, her religion, her self, her thoughts, and her life.


In same way that atheism is not anti-religion, feminism is not anti-men.  But men are not the ideal, and achieving men’s status is not the goal.  The point is not to request our rights, but to assert them and live as if we have them.  Freedom will follow effort.


I assert my right as a human to be free from coercive and unwanted interference.


I am a woman and I am a feminist.


Oh, and in case you were thinking of the other F word: if anyone’s got a problem with that, they can fuck off.



One Response to “The F word”

  1. coogan607 Says:

    I am tempted to say that I’m a feminist, too, but it would probably sound shallow and self-serving. So I won’t. 🙂

    My wife of two years grew up in a Puerto Rican household of bullshit Latin machismo crap. Oh, and her family was Pentecostal, as well. Ye gads! I’m not sure I can convince her she doesn’t have to believe all the crap they tried to feed her, but I keep trying. She’s very smart, so there’s reason to have hope.

    Of course, we all have something to learn, no matter how long we’ve been at it.

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