Five Love Languages

Everything I know about relationships I learned from Christianity (Well, up until recently, on account of not being Christian anymore).  And one of the popular Christian relationship guides is the book, “The Five Love Languages.”  When I read it years ago, I was still a Christian, and I remember thinking it was only loosely Christian.  I might change my mind if I read it now, but it’s not as though everything’s based on scripture.  Anyways, the premise is that everyone has a different way of expressing love, and that people may be expressing affection in a way that their partner doesn’t recognize as an expression of love.  So we are supposed to 1. learn to use the other person’s love language when expressing affection toward them, and 2. recognize when a person is expressing love even though it is not the way you prefer to receive affection. 

Got it?  Good.

So here’s the languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving/Giving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.

So far it all sounds like a decent little theory, right?  You may be thinking, Hey, I’m not a Jesus Freak or nothin’, but that actually might be useful.

Yeah.  I totally agree.

The problem is, I was married for about ten years, and I never figured out my love language.

Wierd, right?  I kinda liked all of those languages; none of them stood out more than another.  So maybe I’m totally multilingual! 

Or, as I have come to hypothesise, maybe I didn’t love my partner, and he didn’t love me.


That’s all.  Just occurred to me.  Thanks for listening.  😀


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3 Responses to “Five Love Languages”

  1. altonwoods Says:

    When I read it years ago, I was still a Christian, and I remember thinking it was only loosely Christian.

    Perhaps what you were picking up was an over emphasis on ourselves and how to satisfy our needs externally, i dunno.

    Thanks for listening….You’re welcome!

    • Alice Says:

      Loosely Christian … in the sense that it was written by a Christian psychologist, but it translates into useful information for a Muslim or humanist or whatever. Faith in a god isn’t required, just a commitment to your relationship.

  2. thedivorceencouragist Says:

    I received that book as a wedding gift and eventually reached the same ultimate conclusion.

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